“Hey Don you want to head to Café Brazil?” I asked.
Don mumbled something and then nodded that he would follow.
I got into Scott Michael’s truck and headed north up Central Expressway to Café Brazil. We nodded at Seema and then headed for our four top near the coffee bar. Don followed shortly after and sat down with a sigh.
“What’s up Don?” I asked.
“My partner left earlier than I did tonight and said, ‘Well you are having a life. I am going to have one too.’ Those words hurt. I haven’t been spending enough time with him.”
Scott Michael looked at Don and asked, “How did he respond when you told him you were a Christian?”
“He thinks it’s great that I have found spirituality, but feels I’m neglecting my responsibilities in my home life and that makes my spirituality a negative thing, cause he looks at my spirituality as destroying our life. I don’t want to be responsible for him putting his walls up. I have only been a Christian for a month and I have changed so much—I have changed so extremely. To him, I went to bed one night and woke up a different person.”
“Do you think you can spend more time with him?” Scott Michael asked.
“I have to. I need to spend more time with him, cause talk is cheap. I’m in a relationship and cannot make it without him. I never thought this would happen between us. He is being introduced to new people who aren’t gay and that is strange. He has met so many and I’m gone a lot.
“You need to watch it,” Scott Michael said.
“It’s so bizarre, I get up and get dressed and am excited to go to DTS at 7 in the morning. That’s not me! I would never in a godzillion years have ever done that. I thought DTS was the seventh ring of hell. I mean I cannot tell you how different I am.”
“You are definitely different,” I said and smiled. I wasn’t sure how to handle this. Here is a guy who is professing Christ and is now venting about his relationship. I wanted to be an influencer for Christ in his life, but at the same time I always felt a need to tell Don that his relationship was wrong. Corinthians was pretty clear about this—and I felt the tension.
“I didn’t come directly home the other night. I had to pass an old cruise bar, and Tuesday night has always been hot, so I went in—man, what a mind ****. I had bottled water, stood around, and then wondered, ‘What the hell am I doing here? Would he be home when I arrived or not?’”
“Was he?” I asked.
“I was scared to find out. I just hung around. I did get cruised and that was nice, but not nice enough. So I left. I’ve come too far and I don’t want to upset the Holy Spirit, so I came home. He was home, but already asleep.”
“He was pissed,” Scott Michael said.
“Damn, I feel like ****. I would like to think I haven’t had a part in this but like most of my issues, I play a huge role, how can something I enjoy so much, cause so much pain? I’ve done some really sleazy things in our relationship. We both have hurt each other, why would something positive have more of a negative effect than “some of the sordid?”
“Sorry you are having a tough time,” I said. I was genuine. I hated that Don was having a hard time, I really did. However, could his hard time be the result of God’s work? It had something to do with it, I was sure, so I decided to let the Holy Spirit keep working.
“See look at this,” Don said. “I have the same problems and same issues as any other couple in America. That’s why I can’t believe you guys when you won’t support equal rights.”
“Don, would you even get married if you could?” I asked wondering if he’d been setting us up the whole time.
“Hell no, it is a broken institution,” Don said. “But I want the right. I want equality. I don’t want to be a second class citizen.”
“You’re not a second class citizen,” Scott Michael said.
“Bullshit, give me my gaddam rights,” Don said.
“Explain to me Don why you wouldn’t get married if you had the right?” I asked.
“What does it solve? It doesn’t do anything but create issues with someone. It hasn’t helped straight people. There is a reason there is a 1-2-3 Divorce right down the street for me.”
“That makes no sense.”
“Hey guys, I gotta get back home. I have to work early tomorrow,” Scott Michael said.
I looked at my watch, yeah, I gotta jet too. We will continue this debate later, Don.”
“****, we better. You are not getting off that easy,” Don said as we paid and left.